This Oh So Real Feeling Fear

 
chloe prudore
 

You’re scared,

terrified even,

“Will this work?

It has to work.

I mean, how could it NOT, right!?”

This normal dialogue plays back and forth in your head as you yet again contemplate, think, ponder, question your last offer, your last program, your website, all the way down to the hashtags you put into the comments on your last Instagram post.

You feel vulnerable, unsure,

as if you’re standing in a dark, damp alley, and your clothes have been viciously ripped right off your freezing body,

and as lights slowly start to enter the scene, your mind begins to register that you are not in fact in a damp alley but indeed on a brightly lit stage for the whole damn world to see.

and quite frankly, deep down, you feel as if YOUR whole world might crash down at any minute.

The money fears,

the time wasted fears,

the will I have to “get real” and get a “REAL” job fears,

The anxiety sets in and back down the spiral you go.

I know this feeling all too well.

It use to be an every day occurrence for me.

And what I’m about to say might possibly trigger,

might possibly upset you,

but then again, what would I be doing if I wasn’t triggering you in all the right places, right?

This feeling, these deep fears, this impending doom,

it use to be an every day occurrence for me.

Until….

well..

until I decided it didn’t have to be.

Until I woke up and realized I was living in an illusion,

an illusion where I was continuing to give my power away.

Moment by moment,

day by day.

I was allowing my fears, my emotions, the way I FELT, this oh so sneaky conditioning

to run my life

to run my business

to dictate how much money I made

and how I showed up online.

The monkey mind, the ego, the logical (but not so logical) left brain, the DEVIL even, whatever you want to call it.

I was allowing it to dictate my dreams, my DESTINY.

until I woke up and realized I didn’t have to let it any longer.

That it wasn’t me.

I was separate from these thoughts.

From these emotions.

From these fears.

And ME continuing to buy into them, to listen, to attach to them,

was the only thing that kept feeding them.

They seemed to have a life of their own,

simply because I kept giving them life.


I was allowing them prime time room and board in my mind, for way longer than was necessary,

way longer than I’d like to admit really.

So I see you.

I feel you.

And know this.

The feelings inside of you are real.

No not those feelings.

Not the fears ad not good enoughs.

Not the what if this doesn’t works and what will people thinks.

But the purpose and SOUL and MADE FOR MORE.

The you who wants to CHANGE THE MF WORLD.

Impact MILLIONS.

The you who wants nothing more than to share your message, live from love, live from FLOW, live from SOUL,

live from a place of just being YOU,

expressing yourself fully,

being the person, deep down, you truly came here to be.

THOSE feelings,

yes EVERY SINGLE ONE of these feelings are real.

They were given to you for a reason,

for a purpose,

so you would indeed wake up and follow them.

and you if recognize the bullshit for what it is, put it aside and do the damn work ANYWAY,

follow your SOUL ANYWAY.

You will have no choice but to make your dreams a reality.

But also know this,

you MUST acknowledge the fears and bs, no not give into them,

but acknoledge them,

recognize they’re there.

You must feel into them,

and then FLIP the MF SWITCH,

and truly DECIDE that they no longer have any power over you.

Because any thought, any feeling, any emotion, any circumstance, any PERSON even,

only has as much power and meaning as you give them.

So what are you going to decide has more power?

The collective conditioning, the mediocrity and bs illusions?


Or the love, the soul, the TRUTH,

bubbling deep down within your very being,

urging you, nudging you,

to trust deeper,

trust FULLY,

to just let tf GO,

to live from LOVE instead of fear?

xx Chlo