The Wound Left by a Narcissist
The wound left by a narcissist.
All the love on the surface.
But deep down, emotionally...
Always something missing.
Never feeling enough.
Never feeling safe to be yourself.
Never feeling safe to feel.
Deep down subconscious fears keep you in fight or flight mode.
Unsure of whether to expect backlash or
criticism in one form or another.
Nothing you ever say, do, express or are is good enough.
Silently, subconsciously waiting to be accepted.
To be validated.
To be allowed to breathe.
To know that you're ok.
You're safe to be you.
It's ok to express yourself.
The inner child within you crying,
Raging with fear and anger.
At the one person who was suppose to be there for you all along.
Who was suppose to teach you about life.
Teach you about yourself.
About your emotions.
How to feel.
And that one person...
sadly engulfed by a demon of manipulation.
Totally unaware of the damage being done.
Lack of empathy.
Lack of trust.
Lack of maturity.
Lack of acceptance.
It feels like abandonment.
It feels like rejection.
It feels like constantly waiting..
Like a good little boy or girl.
For mommy and daddy to approve.
For them to just. f*cking. accept and love you as you are.
Yet waiting for an eternity.
Because the truth of the matter is sweet sweet beautiful child...
That they will never accept you.
Because deep down, they don't accept themselves.
So all you can do is morn the loss of the mother or father you never had.
The love you never knew.
Forgive them because they know not what they do.
For they know not themselves.
And their lack of love, of respect, of empathy, their lack of understanding and acceptance of you, has nothing to do with your worth.
And everything to do with the perception of their own.
So all you can do is forgive.
Let go of the wound the child within you is still holding on to.
And give yourself what they never gave you.
For you are worthy.
You are enough.
You are safe.
Your feelings are valid.
Your desires are valid.
You are whole.
You are perfect.
Exactly as you are.
Wounds and all.
Anger and all.
Tears and all.
Love that little child within you.
Tell her everything is going to be more than ok.
Let them know it is safe to feel.
Safe to love.
Safe to be.
For you can never abandon or reject yourself.
I love you.
And never forget-
Everything you need is within you.